Fitness – Attractive or Intimidating?

Fitness fanatic’s should be proud of their motivation and determination, as it takes time and effort to build body strength through physical exertion.

Working out in general, creates the happiness chemical, and remembering back to the quote made by Elle Woods in the film Legally Blonde, “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy” means we should all be doing some form of regular movement to keep the mind a happy place to be in.




It has taken me a while to become ‘addicted’ to the after effects of training. I firmly believe I could never go back to the girl I was before I ran marathons for fun, and long-term friends will remember the changes I made to get to where I am today.

Which brings me back to the post subject… When seeing someone excel within the fitness world; is it an attractive or intimidating quality?


I know most of you will be thinking I’m mad for even asking such a question. Of course it is attractive to see someone look after themselves. When a person changes their ways so they can ‘better’ their person, whether it’s for the mental or physical changes, it is easy to see why being active would be a positive factor when it comes to the way you view a person. So when do the lines blur? When does this quality then become an intimidating one?



In the last few weeks, I have asked many friends what they thought of those addicted to the life of fitness, and although most saw this as an attractive quality (with a strong 80/20 % split), few also found people who exercise a lot, can be somewhat intimidating.

Why? After thinking over a few examples, I think I have the answer. (Kind of!)




Family and friends have always been supportive of my lifestyle changes, but I have also had a few negative comments. Sometimes people can’t understand the length’s that gym bunnies will go to, to look and feel good. Whether this stems from jealousy, insecurity or in fact, just a general distaste for working out (and the constant posts on Facebook/Twitter about it…) you have to take a step back and honestly say – “Is this my issue, or theirs?”



After wondering why I have had the worst luck within romantic relationships, I questioned whether it was to do with my lifestyle. I do believe my training could be to blame for some of the hiccups I have had with the men I’ve dated in the past.




One guy I was with, short-term, had grown a dislike for the time I spent on training for my marathon. He couldn’t understand why I would want to push my body to the limit, and I think this scared him. He would make remarks on my running régime, and it hadn’t sat well with me. Although he was a lovely guy, he was unable to accept my relationship with running. My happiness was my priority, so unfortunately, one had to make the cut.


Another guy I had been involved with (who was completely supportive of my running) was in awe of my dedication at first, but then sat back and thought negatively of himself. Being the total opposite to me, he would occasionally comment on his own habits and lifestyle. He couldn’t fathom as to why I would be with someone who was not as ‘healthy’ as I was… But I adored his body, regardless of the fact that he never worked out, and it was easy to enjoy the relaxed side of him when I wasn’t in the height of training. However, you can not change the way a person thinks of themselves, no matter how hard you try to comfort their worries.


So did this mean that these men had found my interest in fitness intimidating?




On the flip side of things, what were my thoughts when it came to choosing a mate? I had never dated a person who was into a fit and healthy lifestyle, because I personally have found the extremists within the fitness world have even intimidated myself. Is this because it was the unknown? Did I not feel like I would keep up with someone who was fitter than me? Again, is this my own issue or was it theirs?

Case solved.



At the end of it all, I truly believe that balance is the key to life.

I admire those that are completely committed to that lifestyle, however, I would want anyone to enjoy the finer things in life too. Life is too short to worry about calories and weights sometimes.



Repost from @_lovaine_



So to conclude. Fitness; is it an attractive quality? Most definitely it is. It brings happiness and a sense of being to many, and being active is great therapy for the mind. Confidence is one of the best qualities a person can have, in my eyes, and feeling comfortable in your own skin is something I wish I saw more of. So if training can bring out a better mental attitude in one self, then I believe you’re onto a winner.


Fitness; is it intimidating? It can be, but this is all down to the person. Let’s support everyone’s choices, whether or not it’s ‘our cup of tea’ because life is about challenges, and those who face it, are the greatest people I know.



Has your fitness regime affected your personal life? I would like to hear your stories!




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  • Reply
    Tink Jayne
    February 10, 2017 at 11:41 am

    Okay, this is a tricky one. Because yeah, as you said, if someone is fit, in a physical sense AND they take care of themselves, it is attractive. Of course it is. But having recently dated someone who was mega mega into his fitness and whose body was a glorious sculpture compared to me in all my wobbling glory … your dam right it was intimidating. And I’m a runner! I’m not some slob who sits on the sofa all day (well, sometimes) I exercise regularly and eat well. But his 6 day a week hardcore fitness regime and totally toned abs and pecks and fantastic arms *daydreams for a moment* was intense, and the idea of taking my clothes off in front of this person was suddenly terrifying.
    But as you rightlyly pointed out that was MY issue. Not his. And I would never have asked him to change or do less of that. I suppose the positive is that it certainly motivated me 🙂
    However, I completely disagree that a person should ever put another down for their healthy lifestyle choice. Unless it’s gambling, drinking or smoking, no-one should be moaning at you about it. If it makes you happy and is healthy and you have passion for it, a partner should support you and be encouraging you. Anyone that tries to put you down for it or talk you out of it, even if its disguised by ‘I’m just looking out for you’ they are being selfish, jealous and you don’t need someone like that in your life.
    x tink jayne x

    • Reply
      February 10, 2017 at 11:56 am

      Yes! Very true, I’ve had a man say he was ‘worried’ for my health, when he didn’t have a clue how I spread out my regime.
      People have their own lifestyle and if chose to be with that person, then we have to accept all. I would say it’s great when someone motivates you to do better, because that is what a relationship is about. However, I’m yet to date someone of that nature, don’t know how I would react! Thanks for the input. Xx

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